Love Dare Day 16

Begin praying today for your spouse's heart. Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse's life and in your marriage.



Feel free to post your thoughts/experiences on this dare

You can not change your spouse! As much as you may want to, you can not play God and reach into their heart and mold them into what you want them to be. But that is what most couples spend most of their time trying to do-change their spouse.

Insanity has been described as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. But that isn't that what happens when you try to change your mate? It's frustration at the highest level. At some point you have to accept it is not something you can do. But what you can do is become a wise farmer.

A farmer can not make a seed grow into a fruitful crop. He can not argue, manipulate, or demand it to bear fruit. But he can plant the seed in fertile soil, give it water and nutrients, protect it from weeds, and then turn it over to God. Millions of farmers have made a livelihood from this process. They know that not every seed sprouts. But most WILL grow when planted in proper soil and given what they need.

There is no gaurauntee that anything in this Dare will change your spouse. That is not what this is about. It's about daring you to love. If you take the Dare seriously, there is a high liklihood that you will be personally changed from the inside out. And if you carry on the dare, your spouse will likely be affected, and your marriage will begin to bloom in front of your eyes. It may take weeks or even years, but regardless of the soil you are working with, you are to plan for success. You are to get the weeds out of your marriage. You are to nurture the soil of your spouse's heart and then depend on God for the results.

You will not be able to do it yourself. You need something more powerful, and that is effective prayer. Do you feel like giving up on your marriage? Jesus said to pray instead of quitting (Luke 18:1). Are you stressed out and worried? Prayer can bring peace to your storms (Philippians 4:6-7). Prayer can make a difference! (Acts 12:1-17).

There are some key elements that need to be in order for prayer to be effective. But suffice to say that prayer works best when coming from a humble heart. Have you ever wondered why God gives you overwhelming insight into your spouses hidden faults? Do you really think it is for endless nagging? No, it's for effective kneeling. No one knows better how to pray for your mate than you.

Has your scolding and nagging been working? The answer is no because that is not what changes a heart. A husband will find that God can 'fix' his wife a lot better than he can. A wife will accomplish more through strategic prayer than from all of her persuasive efforts. It is a much more pleasant way to live.

If your spouse does not have a relationship with God, than it is clear what you need to start praying for. Beyond this pray for what your mate needs. Pray for his heart, her attitude. Pray for truth to replace lies, and that forgivnesss will replace bitterness. And then pray for your heart's desires-for love and honor to become the norm.