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Marriage is made up of many things, including joys, sorrows, successes and failures. But when you think about what you want marriage to be like, the furthest thing from your mind is a battleground. However, there are some battles you should be more willing to fight. These are battles that pertain to protecting your spouse.
Unfortunately marriage has enemies out there. They come in different forms and use different strategies, but nonetheless they will conspire to destroy your relationship unless you know how to ward them off.
Some are clever and seem attractive, only to undermine your love and appreciation for one another. Others try to lure your heart away from your spouse by feeding you unhealthy fantasies, and unrealistic comparisons. It's a battle you must wage to protect your marriage- when love puts on armor and picks up a sword to defend its own. Your mate and your marriage need your constant protection from things like:
Harmful influences. Are you allowing certain habits to poison your home? The Internet and television can be productive additions to your home, but they can also bring destructive content and drain away precious hours from your family. The same goes with work schedules that keep you separated from each other for unhealthy amounts of time. You can't protect your home when you're rarely there, nor when you are relationally disconnected. You have to fight to keep the balance right.
Unhealthy relationships. Not everyone has the material to be a good friend. Not every man you hunt and fish with speaks wisely when it comes to marriage. Not every woman in your lunch group has a good perspective on commitment and priorities. In fact, anyone who undermines your marriage does not deserve to be given the title of 'friend'. And you certainly must be on guard at all times from allowing opposite-sex relationships at work, the gym, or even the church to draw you emotionally away from the one to whom you have already given your heart.
Shame. Everyone deals with some level of inferiority and weaknesses. And because marriage has a way of exposing it to you and your mate, you need to protect your wife/husbands vulnerability by never speaking negatively about them in public. Their secrets are your secrets (unless of course these involve destructive behaviors that are putting anyone in danger). Generally speaking, love hides the fault of others, it covers their shame.
Parasites. Watch out for parasites. A parasite is anything that latches onto you or your partner and sucks the life out of your marriage. They're usually in the form of addictions, like gambling, drugs, or pornography. They promise pleasure but grow like a disease and consume more and more of your thoughts, time, and money. They steal away your loyalty and heart from those you love. Marriages rarely survive if parasites are present. If you love your spouse, you must destroy any addiction that has your heart. If you do not, it will destroy you.
Wives-you have the role as protector in your marriage. You must guard your heart from being led away through novels, magazines, and other forms of entertainment that blur your perception of reality and put unfair expectations on your husband. Instead you must do your part in helping him feel strong, while also avoiding talk-show thinking that can lure your attention away from your family. .
Men-you are the head of your home. You are the one responsible to God for guarding the gate and standing your ground against anything that would threaten your wife or marriage. This is no small assignment. It requires a heart of courage and a head of preemptive action. Jesus said:"If the head of the house had known what time of night the thief was coming, he would have been on alert and would not have allowed his house to be broken into" . This role is yours. Take it seriously.
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