Love Dare Day 1.
The first part of the dare is fairly simple. Although love is communicated in a number of ways, our words often reflect the condition of our heart. For the next day, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all. If the temptation aries choose not to say anything. It is better to hold your tongue than say something you will regret.
This is one I do work on a daily basis. I have about an 80% success rate. My problem its in my personality to speak my mind especially to ones I love.
Love Dare Day 2.In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected act of kindness.
I would rather this one become more habitual. Not such a good sucess rate.
I did well on the day of the dare but I used to do alot more RAK for Rick than I do now. Especially when I don't feel good and I am frustrated I just feel more now than ever to just shut down.
Whatever you put your time, energy, and money into will become more important to you. It's hard to care for something you are not investing in. Along with restraining from negative comments, buy your spouse something that says "I was thinking of you today."
I don't have the ability to do this as I wish. I am all about being thoughtful. I think I do it more indirectly than directly. I wonder if he notices?
Contact you spouse sometime during the business of the day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.
I help remind him through out the day of things he needs to remember, just a general I love you, Or something I found he should be interested in. Either by email, text message or phone call.
Ask you spouse to tell you three things that cause him to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is their perspective only.Feel free to post your thoughts/experiences on this dare
Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list of of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.
I work on this daily as well with not perfect results but better results than previous to Love Dare.
For today's dare, get 2 sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second sheet. Place both sheets in a secret place for another day. There is a different purpose for each. At some point during the remainder of the day, pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank your spouse for having that characteristic.
I destroyed the paper but it still sticks in my mind and its not a happy sight for me.
Determine to become your spouse's biggest fan and to reject any thoughts of jealousy. To help you set your heart on your spouse and focus on their achievements, take yesterday's list of negative attributes and discreetly burn it. Then share with your spouse how glad you are about a success he recently enjoyed.
Honestly the truth is I am jealous of his loyality to the Army. It hurts me and at the same time I look forward to recieving that loyality myself.
Think of a specific way you'd like to greet your spouse today. Do it with a smile and enthusiasm. Then determine to change your greeting to reflect your love for them.
This is very important to me anyways. Loosing my first husband suddenly the last words we exchanged were very hateful. I am determined to not part with anyone else on those kind of terms. Those aren't terms I want to pay for when I get to the Gates. In order to arrive with a smile and part with a smile that means when you enter a room don't enter a room and spread negativity. When you leave a room make sure you leave the best part of you. This should be an everyday in every way occurance.
Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse-Something that proves (to you and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. Wash his car, clean the kitchen, buy his favorite dessert, fold the laundry, demonstrate love to him for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage
Every day in my marriage I think of how my husband would react to my actions and what effect my actions will have on my marriage. Whats good for the Goose IS good for the gander?
What need does your spouse have that you could meet today? Can you run an errand? Give a back rub or foot massage? Choose a gesture that says "I cherish you" and do it with a smile.
I am not your 1930's submissive housewife cleaning husband's feet but I do love to dote on my husband and every day we can at lunch time I do rub his head and lay down with him while he takes a quick nap. I know he needs physical affection its his LOVE LANGUAGE and its definately what he needs to survive.
Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse. Tell them you are putting their preference first.
This one is a hard challenge for me like I said I speak my mind. Its hard for me to not correct him but at the same time I have backed off alot on the parental portion and let him handle some good and bad. I just step back.
Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to "fight" by. Resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
We got a date night and we did discuss this at dinner. I didn't get a chance to blog about our wonderful night.
Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he or she would love to do or a project they'd really like to work on. Just be together.
Rick and I are rarely apart if he isn't at work. There isn't much need for us to part doesn't the Army take enough time away from us? Didn't a year seperation for the deployment do enough? Why don't my friends agree? Instead they think we are together and too diabetically sweet to each other. What gives?
Choose a way to show honor and respect to your spouse that is above your normal routine.
To do this on a daily basis just should be second nature to any relationship.
Begin praying today for your spouse's heart. Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse's life and in your marriage.
Determine to guard your mate's secrets (unless they are dangerous to them or to you) and to pray for them. Talk with your spouse, and resolve to demonstrate love in spite of these issues. Really listen to them when they share personal thoughts and struggles with you. Make them feel safe.
I don't think of betraying him.
Prepare a special dinner at home, just for the two of you. The dinner can be as nice as you prefer. Focus this time on getting to know your spouse better, perhaps in areas you've rarely talked about. Determine to make it an enjoyable evening for you and your mate
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