Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse. Tell them you are putting their preference first.
If you were asked to name 3 areas where you and your spouse disagree, you'd likely be able to do it. Unfortunately stubbornness comes as a standard feature on both husband and wife models. Defending your rights and opinions is a foundational part of your nature and make-up. It's detrimental though inside a marriage relationship, and it steals away time and productivity. It can also cause great frustration for both of you. Granted being stubborn is not always bad. Some things are worth standing up for and protecting. Our priorities, our morals, and obedience to God should be guarded with every effort. But too often we debate over piddling things, like the color of wall paint or choice of restaurants.
Other times the stakes are much higher. One of you would like more children, the other would not. One wants to vacation with extended family, the other does not. One prefers home-schooling, the other does not. One of you thinks it is time for marriage counseling or to get more involved with church, while the other doesn't.
Though these issues may not pop up every day they do keep resurfacing and do not really go away. You never seem to get any closer to compromise or resolution.
The only way to go beyond stalemates is by finding a word that is the opposite of stubborn-that word is willing. It is an attitude and spirit of cooperation tat should permeate our conversations. All it takes for your present arguments to stop is for one of you to say "I'm willing to go your way on this one." And though the following through may cost you some pride and discomfort, you have made a loving and lasting investment in your marriage.
"Yes but then I will look foolish. I'll lose a fight or lose control." You have already looked foolish by being bullheaded and refusing to listen. You have already lost the fight by making the issue more important than your marriage and your spouse's sense of worth. You have already lost control by saying things that got personal and hurt your mate.
The wise and loving thing is to approach your disagreements with a willingness to not always insist on your own way. Instead of treating your hubby/wife like an enemy or someone to be guarded against, start by treating them as your closest, most honored friend. Give their words full weight.
No you will not always see eye to eye. You are not supossed to be copies of one another. Two people who always share opinions and perspectives won't have any balance or flavor to enhance the relationship. Rather, your differences are for listening to and learning from.
Are you willing to bend to demonstrate your love? Or are you refusing to because of pride? If it does not matter in the long run-especially in eternity-then give up your rights and choose to honor the one you love.
*God really has a funny sense of humor In my opinion, this dare couldn't have come at a better time.
If you were asked to name 3 areas where you and your spouse disagree, you'd likely be able to do it. Unfortunately stubbornness comes as a standard feature on both husband and wife models. Defending your rights and opinions is a foundational part of your nature and make-up. It's detrimental though inside a marriage relationship, and it steals away time and productivity. It can also cause great frustration for both of you. Granted being stubborn is not always bad. Some things are worth standing up for and protecting. Our priorities, our morals, and obedience to God should be guarded with every effort. But too often we debate over piddling things, like the color of wall paint or choice of restaurants.
Other times the stakes are much higher. One of you would like more children, the other would not. One wants to vacation with extended family, the other does not. One prefers home-schooling, the other does not. One of you thinks it is time for marriage counseling or to get more involved with church, while the other doesn't.
Though these issues may not pop up every day they do keep resurfacing and do not really go away. You never seem to get any closer to compromise or resolution.
The only way to go beyond stalemates is by finding a word that is the opposite of stubborn-that word is willing. It is an attitude and spirit of cooperation tat should permeate our conversations. All it takes for your present arguments to stop is for one of you to say "I'm willing to go your way on this one." And though the following through may cost you some pride and discomfort, you have made a loving and lasting investment in your marriage.
"Yes but then I will look foolish. I'll lose a fight or lose control." You have already looked foolish by being bullheaded and refusing to listen. You have already lost the fight by making the issue more important than your marriage and your spouse's sense of worth. You have already lost control by saying things that got personal and hurt your mate.
The wise and loving thing is to approach your disagreements with a willingness to not always insist on your own way. Instead of treating your hubby/wife like an enemy or someone to be guarded against, start by treating them as your closest, most honored friend. Give their words full weight.
No you will not always see eye to eye. You are not supossed to be copies of one another. Two people who always share opinions and perspectives won't have any balance or flavor to enhance the relationship. Rather, your differences are for listening to and learning from.
Are you willing to bend to demonstrate your love? Or are you refusing to because of pride? If it does not matter in the long run-especially in eternity-then give up your rights and choose to honor the one you love.
*God really has a funny sense of humor In my opinion, this dare couldn't have come at a better time.
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